St Bartholomew Day

A Tale of Faith, Miracles, and Martyrdom

Ever wondered about the bloke behind St Bartholomew Day? Well, buckle up, because we’re diving into the fascinating history of St Bartholomew. From his early days as one of Jesus’ main mates to his globe-trotting adventures spreading the good word, this apostle’s story is anything but dull.

Who Was This Bartholomew Fella?

Alright, let’s kick things off with the basics. Bartholomew was one of the original twelve apostles of Jesus Christ. Yeah, he was in the inner circle, rubbing shoulders with the likes of Peter, John, and the rest of the gang. But here’s the kicker – we don’t know much about his early life. It’s like trying to piece together what your gran did in her twenties – a bit of a mystery!

What we do know is that Bartholomew wasn’t one to sit on his laurels. After Jesus ascended to heaven, our man Bart hit the road. We’re talking serious wanderlust here. He travelled to places like India, Armenia, and Asia Minor, spreading Christianity faster than gossip at a village fête.

The Name Game

Now, here’s a bit of trivia for you. Bartholomew might not even have been his real name! In the Gospel of John, he’s referred to as Nathanael. Some scholars reckon Bartholomew was more of a surname, meaning “son of Tolmai”. So, he might have been Nathanael, son of Tolmai, or Nathanael Bartholomew. It’s like when your mate Dave suddenly tells you his full name is David Bartholomew Smith – bit of a mouthful, innit?

Bartholomew’s Global Tour

Now, picture this: You’re in a foreign land, don’t speak the lingo, and you’re trying to tell people about a completely new religion. Sounds like a right pickle, doesn’t it? But Bartholomew was up for the challenge. He was like the Jamie Oliver of Christianity – passionate about his subject and determined to get everyone on board.

In Armenia, he even managed to convert the king, Polymius. Talk about punching above your weight! This wasn’t just a quick “Cheers, mate, fancy trying out this new religion?” It involved miracles, healings, and some serious convincing. Bartholomew was pulling out all the stops.

The Indian Connection

But Armenia wasn’t Bartholomew’s only stop. There’s a strong tradition that he made it to India. Imagine that – no planes, no trains, not even a decent road map. Just Bartholomew, his faith, and probably a pair of very worn-out sandals.

In India, it’s said he preached in a place called Kalyan, near modern-day Mumbai. Some even reckon he made it as far south as Kerala. Now, I’m not saying he invented curry, but who knows what culinary delights he might have sampled on his travels?

The Not-So-Happy Ending

Now, I hate to be a Debbie Downer, but Bartholomew’s story doesn’t have a Hollywood ending. It’s pretty grim. Because of his missionary work, particularly in Armenia, he met a pretty nasty end. He was flayed alive (that’s having your skin peeled off, in case you were wondering) and then beheaded. Not exactly a walk in the park, eh?

But here’s the thing – Bartholomew’s faith never wavered. Even in the face of such a horrible death, he stuck to his guns. That’s some serious commitment right there.

The Martyrdom Mystery

The exact details of Bartholomew’s martyrdom are a bit fuzzy. Some say it happened in Armenia, others reckon it was in India. There’s even a theory that he met his end in Azerbaijan. It’s like trying to figure out where you left your keys after a night out – the details are a bit hazy, but you know it happened somewhere!

What we do know is that his death was seen as a powerful testament to his faith. In those days, being willing to die for your beliefs was seen as the ultimate proof of their truth. It’s not exactly a method I’d recommend for winning an argument down the pub, mind you.

More Than Just a Day in August

So, why do we still bang on about Bartholomew today? Well, for starters, he’s got his own feast day on August 24th. It’s like a birthday party, but for a saint. In the Episcopal Church and other Christian denominations, it’s a fixed date. But in Eastern churches, they like to keep things interesting and change it up.

But Bartholomew’s influence goes way beyond just having a day named after him. He’s the patron saint of a whole bunch of professions:

• Bookbinders (for all you literature lovers)
• Butchers (not sure how he’d feel about that, given his own fate)
• Cobblers (keeping your shoes in tip-top shape)
• Leather workers (sensing a theme here?)
• Plasterers (for when you need to cover up those DIY disasters)
• Trappers (for the outdoorsy types)

He’s also the go-to saint for folks with nervous or neurological diseases. And if you ever find yourself in Gambatesa, Italy, or Armenia, you might want to give old Bart a nod – he’s their patron saint too.

The Bartholomew Effect

Now, you might be wondering, “Why these particular professions?” Well, it’s all tied up with how Bartholomew met his end. The whole skin-removal thing (sorry to bring it up again) led to him being associated with trades that work with skin and hides. As for the nervous diseases, that’s likely because of the extreme pain he would have endured – people figured if he could handle that, he’d be a good one to ask for help with other types of suffering.

It’s a bit like how we associate certain celebrities with particular causes today. Except instead of asking Bono about world poverty, medieval folks would ask Bartholomew for help with their shoes. Different times, eh?

From Armenia to Art

Remember how I mentioned Bartholomew converted the king of Armenia? Well, that little act had some pretty big consequences. In 301 AD, Armenia became the first nation to adopt Christianity as its official religion. Talk about leaving your mark!

And it’s not just in the history books that Bartholomew made waves. He’s been a popular subject in art for centuries. If you’re ever in a fancy art gallery and spot a bloke holding a knife and his own skin, chances are you’re looking at our man Bart. It’s a bit gory, I know, but the artists were just trying to be historically accurate.

Bartholomew in Pop Culture

But it’s not all serious stuff. Bartholomew’s had some… let’s say interesting appearances in popular culture. In The Simpsons, Bart’s full name is Bartholomew JoJo Simpson. Coincidence? I think not! And in the world of music, the Beatles’ song “The Continuing Story of Bungalow Bill” mentions “the children asked him if to kill was not a sin. ‘Not when he looked so fierce,’ his mummy butted in. Whose name was not Sue, but Sue was all the children knew, and then came Bungalow Bill.” Some folks reckon this is a nod to our man Bartholomew. It’s like playing Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon, but with saints!

Separating Fact from Fiction

Now, let’s be real for a second. When you’re dealing with someone who lived 2000 years ago, it can be tricky to separate the wheat from the chaff. We’ve got some solid historical accounts from folks like Eusebius of Caesarea in his “Ecclesiastical History”. But we’ve also got a fair few legends floating around.

For example, there are stories about Bartholomew healing the sick, casting out demons, and even making a troublesome dragon scarper. Now, I’m not saying these didn’t happen, but let’s just say if I told you I’d seen a dragon down at the local Tesco, you might raise an eyebrow or two.

The Gospel Mystery

Here’s another juicy bit of Bartholomew lore for you. Some reckon he brought a copy of the Gospel of Matthew to India. Now, this wasn’t just any old copy – supposedly, it was in Hebrew and written by Matthew himself. Fast forward to 1866, and a missionary claims to have found this very gospel in India. Sounds a bit like an Indiana Jones plot, doesn’t it? Sadly, most scholars reckon it’s about as likely as finding the Holy Grail in your gran’s attic. But hey, it makes for a cracking story!

Celebrating St Bartholomew Day

So, how can we celebrate this apostle’s life in the 21st century? Well, here are a few ideas:

1. Have a chat with the big man upstairs: If you’re the praying type, why not say a little prayer to St Bartholomew? You could ask for a bit of help in living a good life, or just thank him for his dedication.
2. Pop down to your local church: Even if you’re not religious, churches are often beautiful buildings with a lot of history. And who knows, you might learn something new.
3. Spread a bit of kindness: Bartholomew was all about spreading the love. Why not take a leaf out of his book and do something nice for someone? It doesn’t have to be converting a king – even just making a cuppa for your neighbour counts.

Bartholomew-Inspired Adventures

Fancy something a bit more adventurous? Why not plan a Bartholomew-inspired trip? You could visit St Bartholomew’s Church in London – it’s been around since the 12th century and has some pretty cool stories of its own. Or if you’re feeling really adventurous, you could trace Bartholomew’s steps through Armenia or India. Just maybe leave the preaching to the professionals, yeah?

Gifts for Your Mates on St Bartholomew Day

Now, I’m not saying you need to go out and buy pressies for all your friends on August 24th. But if you fancy it, here are a few ideas:

• A nice leather-bound notebook (for the bookworms and leather workers)
• A fancy kitchen knife (for the budding chefs – just don’t mention the whole flaying thing)
• A pair of comfy shoes (in honour of those cobblers)
• A painting or print of St Bartholomew (for the art lovers)

Or, you know, just send them a nice message. Tell them you’re grateful for their friendship. After all, Bartholomew was all about building connections and spreading good vibes.

DIY Bartholomew-Inspired Gifts

Feeling crafty? Why not make some Bartholomew-inspired gifts? You could try your hand at bookbinding – there are loads of tutorials online. Or how about making some homemade leather keychains? Just don’t go too method actor with the whole skin thing, alright?

What’s Next? Keeping Bartholomew’s Spirit Alive

So, we’ve covered the history, the legends, and even gift ideas. But what now? Well, here are a few thoughts:

1. Plan for next year: Why not organise a St Bartholomew Day party? It could be a great excuse to get your mates together and share some good food and conversation.
2. Learn more: If this little jaunt through Bartholomew’s life has piqued your interest, why not dig deeper? There’s a whole world of early Christian history out there waiting to be explored.
3. Give back: Bartholomew dedicated his life to helping others. Why not volunteer at a local charity or community organisation? It’s a great way to honour his memory and make a difference in your community.

Bartholomew-Inspired Challenges

Fancy pushing yourself a bit? How about setting yourself some Bartholomew-inspired challenges? You could try learning a new language (in honour of his missionary work), or challenge yourself to make a new friend every month (spreading those good vibes). Or if you’re feeling really brave, you could even try going a whole day without complaining. Now that would be a miracle!

Why Bartholomew Still Matters

So, there you have it – the life and times of St Bartholomew. From humble beginnings to world-changing influence, his story is a testament to the power of faith and dedication. Whether you’re religious or not, there’s something to be said for a bloke who was willing to travel the world, face danger, and ultimately give his life for what he believed in.

Bartholomew’s history isn’t just a dusty old tale from the past. It’s a story that still resonates today. It’s about standing up for your beliefs, helping others, and leaving the world a little better than you found it. And in a world that sometimes feels a bit topsy-turvy, couldn’t we all do with a bit more of that?

So next time August 24th rolls around, spare a thought for old Bartholomew. And who knows? Maybe his story will inspire you to make a positive change in your own life. After all, you don’t need to convert a king or face down a dragon to make a difference. Sometimes, just being a good friend, a kind neighbour, or a positive force in your community is enough.

And there you have it – the history of St Bartholomew, from apostle to patron saint, and everything in between. It’s a story of faith, adventure, and lasting impact. Not bad for a bloke who lived 2000 years ago, eh? Whether you’re a history buff, a religious scholar, or just someone who enjoys a good story, Bartholomew’s tale has something for everyone. So go on, share it with your mates over a pint. Who knows? You might just start a whole new St Bartholomew’s tradition of your own.